Today, we are in a hospital room at CLRH. We came in last night because R was peeing blood. He had complained earlier in the day that he was urinating a lot and his feet and ankles were swollen. So, I gave him one of his diuretics that had been stopped when he got dehydrated. About 5:30 he told me about the blood and we called the doc who sent us to the ER. WHAT A NIGHT! First, the doc decided his bladder needed to be flushed. So. a catheter was put in, blood was drawn, EKG done and an antibiotic was given. The nurse was very concerned with the size of of the catheter. You nurses out there will understand and men will empathize. A size 22 or 20 was available and the nurse felt that was too big. So the entire hospital went in search for a smaller one. It was to be used with what they called a Y. This is so fluid goes in at the same time fluid goes out. They found a size 16 deep in a closet in the OR.
During the night the tube going "out" got clogged. Thank goodness for Amaya the charge nurses quick thinking. She knew just what to do but unfortunately the blood clots continued to clog the catheter. When the nurse came in this morning she got in touch with the urologist who ordered a size 22 catheter without the continual flow saline. No Y anymore and the large catheter would flush out the clots without any pain. I had prayed all night he would get relief. R at one point said Mary ask God to help me please! I'm so thankful that the morning came, the nurse assigned to R was able to get in touch with the urologist and called until she got orders. Thanks for answered prayers.
Dr McClure came in and ordered leg ultrasounds so we can find if there are clots in his legs causing
the swelling and the clot in the lung. Dr. Slusky came in to get all of meds restarted and ordered an EKG. we are waiting on Dr Aquino and a urologist we will add to our list of doctors.
Speaking of Dr Slusky... Last week we did see Dr. Castillo at TX ENT. He felt the reason R can't talk is because of a paralyzed vocal chord. He sent us to a voice specialist downtown who we saw the next day. Dr Mary Beaver took some great pictures of his vocal chords. His right chord has a polyp and is paralyzed. She would like to do a day surgery to inject a substance in that chord to close it and then he should be able to speak again. But... He has to get cardiac clearance from Dr. Slusky. We saw him last Thursday and he did not like the speed R's heart was beating. So he said he would have to have a chemical stress test which I do not want him to have to do. Let's just say Dr Slusky and I do
not agree and his degree trumped mine.
So here we are in another hospital room. The TV is on and R is finally sleeping and quietly snoring.
Thank you God for rest. You know R has been questioning if this is all worth it. I spoke to Dr McClure about it this morning and she said that is a reasonable question, although the CT scan did show the chemo is working to improve the cancer. All I know is my husband is miserable. He hates this. He keeps saying his sorry he is putting the kids and I through this. I am sorry he is the one going through it. I would take the pain from him in a heartbeat.
Last week as we sat in the truck drinking our Sonic tea in between appointments, we talked about how angry R is. He is so angry his whole body tenses any time something doesn't go the way he planned. I mean little things as well as the big medical issues. So we talked again about releasing the anger and giving it to God. Anger is such a poison to your body I'm concerned the angerier he gets
the harder it will be for the meds to work. We talked about being angry at God. R has been angry with
him for years and years. You see all three of his sisters died of cancer. He has seen all three go
through what he is now. He feels God took them from him. And now he blames God for his cancer
We have discussed so many times God's love for us and without His love we would not get through every crisis. We also need Him to hear how we feel so that He is able to interveneIi. God can handle our anger.
The past 16 hours I haven't seen the anger like I did last week. And when R asked me to pray last night night that is a huge step in healing. Please dear Lord continue to take Richards pain, listen to his pleas , soften his heart and help him release the anger and feel your love. Thank you for the medical staff and their knowledge in helping to fight this awful disease
Psalm E8:21-22
Lord, do not forsake me;
do not be far from me, my God.
22 Come quickly to help me,
my Lord and my Savior.
#cancersucks
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